Ian Eagle Claims to Have Never Eaten a Condiment
Never?
Everybody has a line they won’t cross when it comes to food. Broccoli. Raw fish. Pineapple on pizza. Some are more common than others. Veteran sports announcer Ian Eagle might have one of the most bizarre and broad culinary hangups out there, though. Eagle refuses to eat any condiments.
He made the shocking revelation during an appearance on The Dan Le Batard Show. (The relevant portion of the segment begins at the 22:20 mark here.)
“It’s not that I don’t like them, I’ve never ingested them,” Eagle said. “There’s a distinction between the two.”
That means no ketchup on burgers. No salad, because dressing is off the table. Not even ketchup with fries.
Asked what he dips his fries in, Eagle replied, “Salt. If you feel like you need the whole motion of dipping, you do that. I don’t feel the need to dip.”
Barbecue sauce appears to be an exception to the rule, although Eagle would prefer not to think about it too hard.
“I do have barbecue sauce,” he said. “I don’t consider that a condiment, although I know deep in my heart it’s a mixture of a lot of crap. But I think I try to just pretend that it’s not, so I’d rather not get into the ingredients of it but I do have barbecue sauce. I’m not a communist.”
He also mentioned eating chicken wings (hot sauce isn’t a condiment?) but recoiled at the thought of dipping them in blue cheese dressing.
“I’ve never had blue cheese in my life,” Eagle said. “That might be my eternal kryptonite. If you’re gonna go and pick one item, it would be between blue cheese and mustard that could end me—right there. End me.”
Eagle joked that the sauce aversion must stem from something in his childhood, and that he always had leverage over his parents if they tried to force him to eat something he didn’t like because he resented that they named him Ian (pronounced EYE-in, rather than EE-in).
The condiment kibosh is worrisome behavior but at least it’s not physically unhealthy. By avoiding condiments, Eagle is sacrificing flavor but skipping excess sugar and sodium. It’s certainly better for the body than Al Michaels' having never eaten a single vegetable.
Eagle was on the SI Media Podcast with Jimmy Traina back in May and also discussed his disgust for salad and condiments. (That discussion begins at the 47:40 mark below.)
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