The updated Power Rankings arrive on Wednesday. But first, the Sour Rankings take a spin through the worst of the past week in the NFL …
Honorable mention, NCAA category
Props to Arizona State's Kalen Ballange, as well as his offensive line, for keeping the wheels moving on this one. But come on, UCLA.
10. CBS upgrades the Wembley end zones
This is different ...
9. Oh, the Browns...
Cleveland—and Josh McCown, in particular—put together a really strong road game Sunday in San Diego. The Browns appeared to have caught a break, too, when the Chargers' Josh Lambo misfired on a potential game-winning field goal with no time left.
Except Tramon Williams jumped offside.
Lambo hit his second chance, from five yards closer in, and the Browns took a tough loss.
8. Fletcher Cox tackles by the hair
Matt Jones knows the risks of sporting long dreadlocks as an NFL player. Defenders are allowed to tackle a player by his hair, which is exactly what Philadelphia's Fletcher Cox did Sunday. Ow.
(GIF via SBNation)
OK, fine, not all kickers. Chicago's Robbie Gould won a game by drilling a 50-yarder in the wind; Arizona's Chandler Cantazaro and Kansas City's Cairo Santos combined to go 12-for-12 (though both their teams lost).
But all in all ... yuck.
Josh Scobee, Caleb Sturgis, Jason Myers and Kyle Brindza all could be looking for jobs as soon as today following ugly weekends. Maybe Zach Hocker, too, after he doinked what should have been a 30-yard game-winner off the upright. Who had it worst? Hard to say. Maybe Brindza, who shanked a pair of field goals and an extra point one week after missing three field goals and another extra point.
A few out-of-work kickers took notice.
Let's keep this simple...bring me back Pittsburgh!— Jeff Reed (@TheRealJeffReed) October 2, 2015
The Eagles' loss Sunday was summed up well by a two-play sequence involving their rookie wide receiver. On the first Agholor made a remarkable one-handed catch on the run. On the next he couldn't handle a pitch on a reverse, resulting in a turnover.
Chip Kelly's call for the trick play probably deserves the spot here, to be honest.
5. Matthew Stafford's wife is not amused
The Lions are the league's lone winless team headed into (and probably coming out of) their Monday nighter in Seattle. Naturally, that's led to ample criticism of Stafford. His wife, Kelly, apparently has had enough, and took her frustrations to Instagram.
Although many in this city have already turned their back on the Lions and Matthew, we will never stop supporting Detroit. No matter how many #9 jerseys people burn or how many negative things people say about these players they will continue to fight for a championship for this city. Thank you @outlinethesky for sending us some Detroit apparel to get us through the winter and thank you Palmer for your constant support. #Detroit #OnePride
4. Stedman Bailey's celebration
I'm all for a good touchdown celebration, and this one wasn't bad:
Of course, because Bailey—gasp! the horror!—used the ball as a prop, it technically should have resulted in a penalty. (New Orleans' Khiry Robinson was flagged on Sunday night for that very reason.)
Sure, there was a flag every 15 seconds in the Sunday night game and no one can explain what a catch is, but yeah, let's get on using footballs as pillows.
3. Martellus Bennett really likes Jay Cutler
The Bears picked up their first win on of the year, thanks in no small part to Cutler's return to the lineup. Afterward, Bennett took to his quarterback's defense against any remaining critics. The unexpected result ...
is Jay Cutler too often criticized? Martellus: "They threw rocks at Jesus, & Jesus was an excellent guy who did a lot of awesome stuff."— Patrick Finley (@patrickfinley) October 4, 2015
Kind of a wild comparison there, although Bennett does have a decent handle on Jesus's scouting report.
2. London gets the Ndamukong Suh experience
During the Dolphins' loss at Wembley Stadium, we were left to wonder if Suh had kicked off Ryan Fitzpatrick's helmet on purpose—amazingly, the second time such a question has come up regarding Suh this season.
After the game was over, Suh held what for him was a rather typical press conference: abrupt, terse and over in a hurry. Suffice it to say, one of the p.r. folks in the room was not impressed:
1. Carolina's incredible touchdown
Every so often, a play winds up on Sour Rankings because it's a must-see, but doesn't necessarily fit the traditional definition of a highlight-reel effort. To wit:
That's Jonathan Stewart fumbling and his teammate, Ed Dickson, catching it on the run and taking it to the house. As if it wasn't bad enough for the Buccaneers that they committed five turnovers, they had to watch the Panthers turn their own near-turnovers into touchdowns.