Clicks: Tulowitzki, Braun lead annual NL-Only Fantasy Spectacular

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BY JAY CLEMONS Recent Fantasy Clicks 03-19-10: The NL-Only Fantasy Spectacular 03-15-10: The AL-Only Fantasy Spectacular 03-12-10: Post-free agency adjustments in fantasy 03-10-10: In Case Of Emergency: Twins' Closer 03-08-10: Fantasy Preview Breakdown, Part III 03-03-10: Fantasy Preview Breakdown, Part II 03-01-10: NFL Combine Revelations 02-26-10: A Fantasy Preview Breakdown 02-24-10: Green Flag Goodness: Hitters 02-17-10: Green Flag Goodness: Pitchers 02-15-10: Red Flag Alerts: Pitchers 1-27-10: Red Flag Alerts: Infielders 1-25-10: Championship Sunday Revelations 1-22-10: Playing A Championship Sunday Hunch 1-20-10: Early Mock Draft Madness 1-18-10: Divisional Playoff Revelations 1-15-10: Divisional Playoff Round Clicks 1-13-10: Back In The Baseball Business 1-11-10: Wild Card Revelations 1-06-10: Fantasy Clicks Year-End Spectacular 1-04-10: Wild Card Round Clicks 12-28-09: Week 16 Revelations/Week 17 Clicks 12-23-09: All You Need To Know For Week 16 12-21-09: Week 15 Revelations 12-18-09: Thursday Night Revelations (Week 15) 12-16-09: Dontcha Hate When That Happens? 12-13-09: Week 14 Revelations 12-11-09: Thursday Night Revelations (Week 14) 12-09-09: Fantasy Playoff Rules To Live By 12-07-09: Week 13 Revelations 12-04-09: Thursday Night Revelations (Week 13) 12-02-09: The Believers Of Calvinism 11-30-09: Week 12 Revelations 11-27-09: Turkey Day Revelations 11-25-09: All Hail The Perfect Showdown 11-23-09: Week 11 Revelations 11-20-09: Thursday Night Revelations, Week 11 11-18-09: Trade Deadline Rules To Live By 11-16-09: Week 10 Revelations 11-13-09: Thursday Night Revelations, Week 10 11-11-09: The Ballad Of Alex Smith 11-09-09: Week 9 Revelations 11-06-09: The Daffy Dichotomy Of DeAngelo 11-04-09: A Pre-Flight Trade Checklist 11-02-09: Week 8 Revelations 10-30-09: Meet The Avoidables 10-28-09: Rodgers vs. Favre -- A Lambeau Reunion 10-26-09: Week 7 Revelations 10-23-09: Fright ... For Old D.C. 10-21-09: Shoot For The Moon With Brady 10-18-09: Week 6 Revelations 10-16-09: The Pittsburgh Shell Game 10-14-09: The Tailback Honeymoon's Over 9-28-09: Week 3 Revelations

The Obligatory NL-Only Fantasy Spectacular

Troy Tulowitzki: Doug Pensinger/Getty Images

The topper for today's NL-Only Fantasy Spectacular was actually written on Tuesday night ... just minutes before my National League auction draft online, just hours before Jeff Ritter's unofficial going-away party/St. Patrick's Day bar crawl and just days before the NCAA tournament began in earnest. Lucky for me, no earth-shattering news broke in the last three days of my mini-vacation (Ron Washington's disturbing plight isn't necessarily fantasy-related); and lucky for you, the loyal reader, this is the last time I'll flood Clicks with list, after list, after list, after list. So, without further ado, here's an all-encompassing resource for dominating NL-only drafts. Enjoy!

(Note: If you're looking to do wonders in an AL-only draft, click here.)

Auction This

Apparently, I'm game for anything stupid -- as long it makes for good fodder with Fantasy Clicks. What other reason could possibly explain intentionally drafting only National League players in a mixed-league auction on Tuesday night? ($260 salary cap) This wasn't some random mock draft on; no, this experiment was conducted for an actual league, where owners traditionally salivate at the prospect of torturing short-sighted morons, like myself, for six months. Will I regret passing on Wade Davis for Mat Latos? Or Alexei Ramirez for Casey McGehee? Or ... Adam Jones for Carlos Gonzalez? Only time will tell.

Here are the results from Tuesday's auction draft: (Note: All American Leaguers taken -- except for Torii Hunter -- were taken on autodraft, as I had to tend to a personal matter)

Phase I -- Early Spending Spree
2B Chase Utley, Phillies -- $37
SS Troy Tulowitzki, Rockies -- $30
SP Tim Lincecum, Giants -- $31
1B Joey Votto, Reds -- $24
SP Tommy Hanson, Braves -- $18

Phase II -- Restrained, Yet Jubilant Spending
SP Adam Wainwright, Cardinals -- $18
OF/1B Adam Dunn, Nationals -- $14
OF Carlos Gonzalez, Rockies -- $13
RP Carlos Marmol, Cubs -- $6
OF Nyjer Morgan, Nationals -- $10
SP Mat Latos, Padres -- $6

Phase III -- Smart Shopping
OF Torii Hunter, Angels -- $12
RP Octavio Dotel, Pirates -- $7
2B Kelly Johnson, Diamondbacks -- $3
OF Cameron Maybin, Marlins -- $5 (due for a significant breakout)

Phase IV -- Guilty Pleasures
SP Stephen Strasburg, Nationals -- $6
RP Drew Storen, Nationals -- $4

Phase V -- Bargain Bins
SP Ryan Dempster, Cubs -- $3
C Bengie Molina, Giants -- $2
SP Ben Sheets, Athletics -- $2 (MUCH less than what Oakland shelled out)
2B/3B Casey McGehee, Brewers -- $2
3B Mat Gamel, Brewers -- $1
3B Kevin Kouzmanoff, Athletics -- $1
OF Austin Jackson, Tigers -- $1

Verdict: This is hardly the best team I've drafted in the last 10 days, but the foundation is there for a strong season. Yes, a lot of the bargain-bin picks could be viewed as reaches in mixed leagues, and yes, I likely have way too many Nationals on the roster (whither Elijah Dukes?) ... but any club with an outfield of Adam Dunn, Carlos Gonzalez, Torii Hunter and Nyjer Morgan can't be all that bad. Throw in Austin Jackson and Cameron Maybin, and I have a legitimate chance at winning steals and runs. The trick now, as I see it, is to scoop up 2-3 more power hitters, via waivers or trade, and then hope (read: pray) the Nationals don't keep Stephen Strasburg in the minors for too long. Pretty selfish, huh?

Auction That

In case you care, these 19 National Leaguers garnered bids of $22 or more in Tuesday's mock:
1B Albert Pujols, Cardinals -- $47
SS Hanley Ramirez, Marlins -- $44
OF Ryan Braun, Brewers -- $39
2B Chase Utley, Phillies -- $37
1B Ryan Howard, Phillies -- $36
OF Matt Kemp, Dodgers -- $36
1B Prince Fielder, Brewers -- $34
SP Tim Lincecum, Giants -- $31
3B David Wright, Mets -- $30 (risky move for power-sapped hitter in '09)
SS Troy Tulowitzki, Rockies -- $30
OF Justin Upton, Diamondbacks -- $29
SP Roy Halladay, Phillies -- $29 (it's still weird to see him in Philly garb)
1B Adrian Gonzalez, Padres -- $28
3B Pablo Sandoval, Giants -- $27
3B Ryan Zimmerman, Nationals -- $26
OF Matt Holliday, Cardinals -- $25
1B Joey Votto, Reds -- $24
SS Jimmy Rollins, Phillies -- $23
SP Dan Haren, Diamondbacks -- $22

WHIP Masters

Citing my favorite pitching stat, here are's projections for National League starting pitchers with WHIPs of 1.28 or less ... and at least 100 innings pitched this season (ruling out Stephen Strasburg for the time being):

1. Tim Lincecum, Giants -- 1.04
2. Chris Carpenter, Cardinals -- 1.07
3. Dan Haren, Diamondbacks -- 1.10
4. Roy Halladay, Phillies -- 1.12
5. Cole Hamels, Phillies -- 1.18
6. Johan Santana, Mets -- 1.18
7. Roy Oswalt, Astros -- 1.19
8. Josh Johnson, Marlins-- 1.21
9. Randy Wolf, Brewers -- 1.22
10. Ted Lilly, Cubs -- 1.23
11. Huroki Kuroda, Dodgers -- 1.23
12. Matt Cain, Giants -- 1.23
13. Brandon Webb, Diamondbacks -- 1.25
14. Ricky Nolasco, Marlins -- 1.25
15. Tommy Hanson, Braves -- 1.25
16. Ubaldo Jimenez, Rockies -- 1.25
17. Adam Wainwright, Cardinals -- 1.25
18. Tim Hudson, Braves -- 1.26
19. Chien-Ming Wang, Nationals -- 1.26
20. Wandy Rodriguez, Astros -- 1.27
21. Edwin Jackson, Diamondbacks -- 1.28
22. Madison Bumgarner, Giants -- 1.29
23. Joe Blanton, Phillies -- 1.29
24. Clayton Kershaw, Dodgers -- 1.29
25. Ryan Dempster, Cubs -- 1.29
26. Yovani Gallardo, Brewers -- 1.29

We Rank 'Em, You Draft 'Em: Catchers

Here are the up-to-date rankings for National League catchers (5x5 scoring):
1. Brian McCann, Braves
2. Miguel Montero, Diamondbacks
3. Geovany Soto, Cubs
4. Russell Martin, Dodgers
5. Bengie Molina, Giants
6. Ryan Doumit, Pirates
7. Ramon Hernandez, Reds
8. Chris Iannetta, Rockies
9. Buster Posey, Giants
10. John Baker, Marlins
11. Carlos Ruiz, Phillies
12. Jeff Clement, Pirates
13. Pudge Rodriguez, Nationals
14. J.R. Towles, Astros
15. Miguel Olivo, Rockies
16 Gregg Zaun, Brewers
17 Jesus Flores, Nationals
17. Nick Hundley, Padres
18. Yadier Molina, Cardinals
20. Jason Jaramillo, Pirates

**For a complete list of catcher rankings, click here.

We Rank 'Em, You Draft 'Em: First Base

1. Albert Pujols, Cardinals (the greatest of all time? ... maybe)
2. Ryan Howard, Phillies (shouldn't slip past No. 8 in mixed leagues)
3. Prince Fielder, Brewers
4. Adrian Gonzalez, Padres
5. Mark Reynolds, Diamondbacks (the greatest wild card amongst the group)
6. Lance Berkman, Astros
7. Derrek Lee, Cubs
8. Joey Votto, Reds (wayyyyyyyyyy too good to be No. 8 here -- tough crowd)
9. Pablo Sandoval, Giants
10. Adam Dunn, Nationals
11. Garrett Jones, Pirates
12. James Loney, Dodgers
13. Adam LaRoche, Diamondbacks
14 Jorge Cantu, Marlins
15. Todd Helton, Rockies
16. Aubrey Huff, Giants
17. Travis Ishikawa, Giants
18. Jeff Clement, Pirates (a major sleeper in NL-only leagues)
19. Martin Prado, Braves
20. Micah Hoffpauir, Cubs

**For a complete list of first base rankings, click here.

We Rank 'Em, You Draft 'Em: Second Base

1. Chase Utley, Phillies
2. Dan Uggla, Marlins
3. Ian Stewart, Rockies
4. Brandon Phillips, Reds
5. Rickie Weeks, Brewers
6. Casey McGehee, Brewers
7. Placido Polanco, Phillies
8. Martin Prado, Braves
9. Skip Schumaker, Cardinals
10. Akinori Iwamura, Pirates
11. Kelly Johnson, Diamondbacks
12. Adam Kennedy, Nationals
13 Clint Barmes, Rockies
14. Eugenio Velez, Giants
15. Freddy Sanchez, Giants
16. Kazuo Matsui, Astros
17. Emilio Bonifacio, Marlins
18. Luis Castillo, Mets
19. Mike Fontenot, Cubs
20. Ronnie Belliard, Dodgers

**For a complete list of second base rankings, click here.

We Rank 'Em, You Draft 'Em: Shortstop

1. Hanley Ramirez, Marlins
2. Troy Tulowitzki, Rockies
3. Jose Reyes, Mets
4. Jimmy Rollins, Phillies
5. Yunel Escobar, Braves
6. Stephen Drew, Diamondbacks
7. Rafael Furcal, Dodgers
8. Alcides Escobar, Brewers
9. Ryan Theriot, Cubs
10. Orlando Cabrera, Reds
11. Everth Cabrera, Padres
12. Emilio Bonifacio, Marlins
13. Julio Lugo, Cardinals
14 Cristian Guzman, Nationals
15. Ian Desmond, Nationals
16. Brendan Ryan, Cardinals
17. Edgar Renteria, Giants
18. Jeff Keppinger, Astros
19. Ronny Cedeno, Pirates
20. Tommy Manzella, Astros

**For a complete list of shortstop rankings, click here.

We Rank 'Em, You Draft 'Em: Third Base

1. David Wright, Mets
2. Mark Reynolds, Diamondbacks
3. Aramis Ramirez, Cubs (should return to fantasy greatness with 140 games)
4. Pablo Sandoval, Giants
5. Chipper Jones, Braves
6. Ryan Zimmerman, Nationals (wayyyyy too good for a No. 6 ranking)
7. Ian Stewart, Rockies
8. Casey McGehee, Brewers
9. Jorge Cantu, Marlins (one of the most underrated performers in fantasyland)
10. Casey Blake, Dodgers
11. Chase Headley, Padres
12. Scott Rolen, Reds
13. Martin Prado, Braves
14 Troy Glaus, Braves
15. Pedro Alvarez, Pirates (see you around June 1, Pedro)
16. David Freese, Cardinals
17. Mat Gamel, Brewers
18. Pedro Feliz, Phillies
19. Andy LaRoche, Pirates
20. Jerry Hairston, Padres

**Note: Second baseman Placido Polanco is slated to be Philadelphia's third baseman on Opening Day ... making him 3B-eligible for the hot corner sometime around April 11.

**For a complete list of third base rankings, click here.

Flamethrowers 'R Us

Josh Johnson: Mitchell Layton/Getty Images

Since you can never have enough great pitching, here are's National League projections for strikeout leaders. The cut-line for this elite list stands at 147:

1. Tim Lincecum, Giants -- 260
2. Yovani Gallardo, Brewers -- 216
3. Dan Haren, Diamondbacks -- 201
4. Clayton Kershaw, Dodgers -- 201
5. Roy Halladay, Phillies -- 200
6. Adam Wainwright, Cardinals -- 200
7. Johan Santana, Mets -- 200
8. Ubaldo Jimenez, Rockies -- 200
9. Chad Billingsley, Dodgers -- 200
10. Ricky Nolasco, Marlins -- 199
11. Jorge de la Rosa, Rockies -- 196
12. Josh Johnson, Marlins -- 195
13. Cole Hamels, Phillies -- 190
14. Wandy Rodriguez, Astros -- 185
15. Tommy Hanson, Braves -- 184
16. Aaron Harang, Reds -- 184
17. Matt Cain, Giants -- 181
18. Jonathan Sanchez, Giants -- 180
19. Ryan Dempster, Cubs -- 176
20. Bud Norris, Astros -- 173
21. Homer Bailey, Reds -- 172
22. Johnny Cueto, Reds -- 170
23. Oliver Perez, Mets -- 170
24. Brett Myers, Astros -- 168
25. Carlos Zambrano, Cubs -- 167
26. Edwin Jackson, Diamondbacks -- 166
27. Joe Blanton, Phillies -- 165
28. John Maine, Mets -- 165
29. Randy Wolf, Brewers -- 159
30. Jair Jurrjens, Braves -- 152
31. Brandon Webb, Diamondbacks -- 149
32. J.A. Happ, Phillies -- 148
33. Andrew Miller, Marlins -- 147

We Rank 'Em, You Draft 'Em: Starting Pitchers

Here are the up-to-date rankings for National League starting pitchers (5x5 scoring):
1. Tim Lincecum, Giants
2. Roy Halladay, Phillies
3. Adam Wainwright, Cardinals
4. Dan Haren, Diamondbacks
5. Josh Johnson, Marlins
6. Yovani Gallardo, Brewers
7. Clayton Kershaw, Dodgers
8. Tommy Hanson, Braves
9. Ubaldo Jimenez, Rockies
10. Johan Santana, Mets
11. Ricky Nolasco, Marlins
12. Matt Cain, Giants
13 Wandy Rodriguez, Astros
14. Cole Hamels, Phillies
15. Chad Billingsley, Dodgers
16. Chris Carpenter, Cardinals
17. Roy Oswalt, Astros
18. Jair Jurrjens, Braves
19. Ryan Dempster, Cubs
20. Jorge de la Rosa, Rockies
21. Edwin Jackson, Diamondbacks
22. Randy Wells, Cubs
23 Carlos Zambrano, Cubs
24. Zach Duke, Pirates
25. Stephen Strasburg, Nationals

**For a complete list of starting pitcher rankings, click here.

We Rank 'Em, You Draft 'Em: Relief Pitchers

1. Jonathan Broxton, Dodgers
2. Heath Bell, Padres
3. Trevor Hoffman, Brewers
4. Francisco Rodriguez, Mets
5. Brad Lidge, Phillies
6. Billy Wagner, Braves
7. Francisco Cordero, Reds
8. Ryan Franklin, Cardinals
9. Carlos Marmol, Cubs
10. Huston Street, Rockies
11. Leo Nunez, Marlins
12. Brian Wilson, Giants
13. Brandon Lyon, Astros
14. Chad Qualls, Diamondbacks
15. Octavio Dotel, Pirates
16. Luke Gregerson, Padres
17. Sergio Romo, Giants
18. Drew Storen, Nationals
19. Jason Motte, Cardinals
20. Matt Lindstrom, Astros
21. Matt Capps, Nationals
22. George Sherrill, Dodgers
23. Ryan Madson, Phillies
24. Carlos Villanueva, Brewers
25. Takashi Saito, Braves
26. Ramon Troncoso, Dodgers
27. Renyel Pinto, Marlins
28. Bobby Parnell, Mets
29 John Grabow, Cubs
30. Mike Adams, Padres

**For a complete list of reliever rankings, click here.

Depth Of Knowledge

There is no greater draft-day resource than the official depth charts for each NL club:
National League
Marlins | Braves | Mets | Phillies | Nationals

Reds | Pirates | Cubs | Brewers | Cardinals | Astros

Dodgers | Diamondbacks | Padres | Rockies | Giants

The Missing Links

Need a Hamburger Helper-like hand with your research? Check out these sites:
**Baseball America
**Baseball America's 2010 Top Prospects
**Rotowire Player Search Database (great for targeting prospects)
**'s Stats page
**'s Fantasy Page
**Baseball Prospectus
**The Hardball Times
**The Detroit News' Tigers blog (Tom Gage, author)
**Seattle Times' Mariners blog (Geoff Baker, author)

We Rank 'Em, You Draft 'Em: Outfielders

What's good for the goose is good for the gander ... the top 25 NL-only outfielders:
1. Ryan Braun, Brewers
2. Matt Kemp, Dodgers
3. Matt Holliday, Cardinals
4. Jayson Werth, Phillies
5. Justin Upton, Diamondbacks
6. Carlos Lee, Astros
7. Jason Bay, Mets
8. Shane Victorino, Phillies
9. Andrew McCutchen, Pirates
10. Andre Ethier, Dodgers
11. Carlos Beltran, Mets
12. Alfonso Soriano, Cubs
13. Adam Dunn, Nationals
14. Hunter Pence, Astros
15. Corey Hart, Brewers
16. Carlos Gonzalez, Rockies
17. Jay Bruce, Reds
18. Manny Ramirez, Dodgers
19. Garrett Jones, Pirates
20. Nate McLouth, Braves
21. Kyle Blanks, Padres (love this kid's potential)
22. Ryan Ludwick, Cardinals
23. Raul Ibanez, Phillies
24. Michael Bourn, Astros
25. Dexter Fowler, Rockies

**For a complete list of outfielder rankings, click here.

It's All About The Slot: #5

The No. 5 overall pick in mixed-league drafts might be the equivalent of fantasy torture ... but there's a certain coolness to landing the 5-spot in 10-team NL- (or AL-only) leagues. For starters, you have a decent shot at stealingRyan Howard in Round 1; and then you have a sublime chance at either Matt Holliday, Adam Wainwright, Dan Haren, Pablo Sandoval, Jayson Werth, Jose Reyes or Josh Johnson sometime in Rounds 2 or 3. More importantly, it buys you time to monitor the rosters and drafting habits of your fellow owners; because, as we all know, owners must be incredibly savvy and prepared to succeed in restricted-player drafts. Any moron can win a mixed league ... but a true fantasy expert kills when swimming in a shallow player pool. Enough rambling -- here's an excellent strategy for nailing NL-only drafts at this slot:

Round 1, Pick 5: Motive -- Best overall player
1st option: OF Matt Kemp, Dodgers ... 2nd option: 1B Ryan Howard, Phillies

Round 2, Pick 16 overall: Motive -- Best 5-category stud
1st option: 3B/1B Mark Reynolds, Diamondbacks ... 2nd option: SS Jose Reyes, Mets

Round 3, Pick 25 overall: Motive -- Best power-hitting outfielder
1st option: OF Jayson Werth, Phillies ... 2nd option: OF Hunter Pence, Astros

Round 4, Pick 36 overall: Motive -- Best starting pitcher or 5-category outfielder
1st option: SP Tommy Hanson, Braves ... 2nd option: SP Yovani Gallardo, Brewers

Round 5, Pick 45 overall: Motive -- Best overall player
1st option: SP Clayton Kershaw, Dodgers ... 2nd option: SP Ricky Nolasco, Marlins

Round 6, Pick 56 overall: Motive -- Best outfielder with 5-category potential
1st option: OF Carlos Gonzalez, Rockies ... 2nd option: OF Jay Bruce, Reds

Round 7, Pick 65 overall: Motive -- Best middle infielder or high-end pitcher
1st option: SS Yunel Escobar, Braves ... 2nd option: SP Chad Billingsley, Dodgers

Round 8, Pick 76 overall: Motive -- Best player available (positional versatility crucial)
1st option: 2B/3B Ian Stewart, Rockies ... 2nd option: SP Ryan Dempster, Cubs

Round 9, Pick 85 overall: Motive -- Best player available
1st option: OF/1B Garrett Jones, Pirates ... 2nd option: SP Jorge de la Rosa, Rockies

Round 10, Pick 96 overall: Motive -- Best infielder or 5-tool outfielder
1st option: C Ryan Doumit, Pirates ... 2nd option: OF Corey Hart, Brewers

Round 11, Pick 105: Motive -- Best available closer
1st option: RP Leo Nunez, Marlins ... 2nd option: RP Brandon Lyon, Astros

Round 12, Pick 116: Motive -- Best power hitter with upside
1st option: OF Kyle Blanks, Padres ... 2nd option: OF Jason Heyward, Braves

Round 13, Pick 125: Motive -- Best reliever or middle infielder
1st option: RP Octavio Dotel, Pirates ... 2nd option: 2B Kelly Johnson, Diamondbacks

Round 14, Pick 136: Motive -- Best corner infielder
1st option: 2B/3B Casey McGehee, Brewers ... 2nd option: 3B Casey Blake, Dodgers

Round 15, Pick 145: Motive -- Best power pitcher
1st option: RP Drew Storen, Nationals ... 2nd option: SP Aroldis Chapman, Reds

Round 16, Pick 156: Motive -- Best player available
1st option: SP Homer Bailey, Reds ... 2nd option: OF Scott Hairston, Padres

Round 17, Pick 165: Motive -- Best catcher available
1st option: C Buster Posey, Giants ... 2nd option: C Pudge Rodriguez, Nationals

Round 18, Pick 176: Motive -- Best corner infielder with upside
1st option: 1B/C Jeff Clement, Pirates ... 2nd option: 3B Andy LaRoche, Pirates

Round 19, Pick 185: Motive -- Best overall player
1st option: SP Bronson Arroyo, Reds ... 2nd option: 2B Adam Kennedy, Nationals

Round 20, Pick 196: Motive -- Best outfielder
1st option: OF Gerardo Parra, Diamondbacks ... 2nd option: SP Jeff Francis, Rockies

Round 21, Pick 205: Motive -- Best player with last name of 'Romo'
1st option: RP Sergio Romo, Giants ... 2nd option: 3B/SS Jeff Keppinger, Astros

Round 21, Pick 205: Motive -- Best long-range talent who'll up be called up by June 1
1st option: 3B Pedro Alvarez, Pirates ... 2nd option: SP Bud Norris, Astros

Wanna Join Our Baseball League?

Back by popular demand, we've decided to admit at least one lucky Fantasy Clicks reader into the & Friends fantasy baseball league. Up until March 21, we'll be accepting short-essay submissions (limit 1-2 paragaphs please) for the final slot in our small, but prestigious league (kind of like George Costanza). The requirements are simple: Outside of having reliable computer access for Draft Day (either March 31 or April 1), you must demonstrate passion for fantasy baseball (hence, the short essay) and derive regular pleasure from posting humorous retorts on our league message board.

One last thing: It certainly helps to be comfortable with accepting or declining blockbuster trade proposals during the graveyard-shift period of 2-6 a.m. -- the bewitching hours for all the Atlanta-based employees. You can also hit me up on Twitter for this contest ... although it'll be hard to meet the above requirements in 140 characters or less. Good luck!

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