You already did all your holiday shopping (gift cards), and you've watched your favorite Christmas movie (the Star Wars Holiday Special) four or five times, so now what are you supposed to do with the rest of the weekend? You've got questions, and we've got answers. We rounded up the best things to do, eat, watch and buy this weekend, so you have an excuse not to go to that gingerbread house workshop your mom keeps suggesting.
. NYC SantaCon
Saturday | New York, N.Y.
I won’t lie to you. It goes against everything I stand for to include SantaCon in my recommendations of things to do. But because thousands of people seem to love it for reasons I cannot understand, here it is. SantaCon uses your $10 donation to support New York charities, and in exchange you get to wear an itchy costume all day and start drinking at 10 a.m. Finally, you’ll have the opportunity to watch a girl dressed up as a Christmas tree cry and throw up into her own purse. I can’t think of a better way to spend a Saturday.
. Films on Tap: Die Hard
Friday | Denver, CO
From one of the worst Christmas traditions to one of the best ones. Die Hard is arguably the best Christmas movie ever (Muppets Christmas Carol notwithstanding), and the Denver Film Society is making watching it this year even more fun. Head to the Sie FilmCenter for a screening of the film and an accompanying drinking game. Audience members will drink when: there’s a Christmas reference, McClane takes out a bad guy, and something explodes. Finish your drink at "Yipee-ki-yay, mother******." The first 50 people in the door get a free beer from Breckenridge Brewery, so there’s pretty much no reason not to go.
. Strings & Sol
Thursday – Monday | Puerto Morelos, MX
What better way to escape the first chill of winter than by heading to a bluegrass festival on the beaches of Mexico? This year’s lineup includes some heavy-hitting names like Yonder Mountain String Band, Railroad Earth, and Leftover Salmon. One of the best parts of the festival is the accessibility of the artists – they’ll be hosting workshops, judging the Pickin’ Contest, and play in a ping-pong tournament. And if you’re sad about missing SantaCon (why??), don’t worry -- there are theme nights that encourage attendees to come in costume.
. Double Fried Twinkie
FedEx Forum | Memphis, TN
Not one but two Twinkies double-fried in funnel cake batter and topped with a choice of caramel, strawberries, raspberries, and chocolate. It’s a good thing you’re just watching a basketball game, because the last thing you’re going to want to do after eating one of these things is run up and down a court. For more information, including a (gulp) calorie count, check out our Concession Food Item of the Week.
. Money Manziel Cake
Colossal Cupcakes | Cleveland, OH
It’s time for Johnny Football to have his moment in the sun. It might be hard to believe given the amount of airtime he gets, his celebrity friends, and, you know, the nickname, but this will be the first time that Johnny Manziel starts an NFL game. It’s a pretty great birthday gift for the quarterback, who turned 22 this week, and you can celebrate just like he did with a custom Money Manziel cake from Cleveland’s Colossal Cupcakes. Apparently, the cake weighs 45 pounds and took two days to create. And after you eat one of those, you can simply take one of Manziel’s jazzercise classes to burn it off.
. Alligator Tail
Somewhere in Florida
Make like Crimson Tide coach Nick Saban, who feasted on fried alligator tail this week in an attempt to woo recruit CeCe Jefferson. Saban's palate is notoriously limited (he's eaten a breakfast of Little Debbie's oatmeal creme pies every day for who knows how long), so fried gator must be something really special if it made him break the mold. Either that, or Jefferson is. On second thought, yeah, that seems more likely.
. Dew Tour Mountain Championships
Friday thru Sunday | NBC
The top freestyle winter athletes will gather in Breckenridge, Colo., this weekend for the Dew Tour Mountain Championships. Now in its seventh year at Breck, the event will be televised on NBC and NBCSN throughout the weekend. Some athletes to look out for: Danny Davis, Scotty Lago, Louie Vito, Kohei Kudo, Kelly Clark, Elena Hight, Hannah Teter, Chloe Kim, Justin Dorey, Yannic Lerjen, Jamie Anderson, Spencer O’Brien, Torstein Horgmo, Sage Kotsenburg, Keri Herman, and more. Just try not to get Vertigo-by-proxy while watching all that spinning.
. Army-Navy game
Saturday | CBS
USAA presents the 114th annual Army-Navy game this Saturday, continuing a tradition that started in 1890. Navy is looking to continue its 12-game winning streak against Army, and hopes aren’t high for first-year Army coach Jeff Monken. But if he can pull off the win, it’ll be one of the most stunning upsets and most thrilling victories… maybe ever? We’ve rounded up the best moments in the Army-Navy rivalry, and for a little more about what life is like for athletes at a military academy, check out our College Football section.
. I Am Ali
If you can tear your eyes away from Inherent Vice and Top 5 this week, head back home for a little boxing history. After a limited theatrical release, I Am Ali is coming to a TV screen near you courtesy of Netflix. This documentary about boxing great Muhammad Ali features archival footage of Ali cut together in a complete biography of one of the most interesting and iconic figures in sports. Interviewees include his former coaches, children, and a few celebrity appearances.
. NFL Player Ugly Sweater
$49.99 | Fresh Brewed Tees
Finally, something to wear to all the twee Ugly Sweater parties you’re about to get invited to. Fresh Brewed Tees has officially-licensed Christmas sweaters featuring six of the NFL’s top players: J.J. Watt, Peyton Manning, Johnny Manziel, Dez Bryant, Richard Sherman and Colin Kaepernick. This year, remember the true meaning of Christmas: wearing your favorite athletes’ faces on shirts semi-ironically but also kind of sincerely.
. Bobby Cox’s 1989 Rolls Royce
$20k | eBay
Someone is selling what they claim to be Bobby Cox’s old car on eBay, and since it’s on the internet, it must be true. According to the seller, “Talk about LUXURY and a car before its time. Here it is. A 1989 Rolls Royce Silver Spur that we purchased from Former Atlanta Braves HALL OF FAME manager Bobby Cox who had owned it since August 2006. This car is like new condition!! It only has 31,000 Original Miles on it. It has always been kept in a climate controlled garage. It has the 6.8 Liter engine and it runs like a dream. Drive across the country in style. It has every option I guess you could get at that time. Everything works as it did in 1989 when new. THIS CAR IS LIKE NEW!!” With that many capital letters, it must be a good deal!
. Chris Bassitt's old White Sox gear
Free! | Twitter
The White Sox recently sent pitcher Chris Bassitt to the Oakland A’s as part of the Jeff Samardzija trade. Apparently Bassitt likes to travel light, because rather than pack up his old Sox stuff to take with him, he announced on Twitter that he would give it away to White Sox fans. To find out how to win his used merchandise, click right here.
. SI’S HOLIDAY GIFT GUIDE
You might be an adult, but let’s be real - you want to unwrap toys this year. While you might have outgrown that old Buzz Lightyear in your room (lol no you haven’t), we’ve got plenty of toys for grown-up sports lovers in our Holiday Gift Guide. Simply send this along to all your relatives so you don’t have to fake-smile while opening your 15th iTunes gift card.