SI's 2016 Signs of the Apocalypse
January 11, 2016 SI Issue
Chip Kelly was fired in part because he forced the Eagles to change the traditional date of their Christmas party, according to CBS.
January 18, 2016 SI Issue
The Raiders’ Khalil Mack was voted an All-Pro at two positions (OLB and DE), although his team listed him only as a DE.
January 25, 2016 SI Issue
Trinidad and Tobago gymnast Marisa Dick invented a new move, which has been named after her.
February 1, 2016 SI Issue
While in New York to play the Nets, Thunder forward Steve Novak ordered a room-service latte at the Trump Soho, for which he was charged $20.67.
February 8, 2016 SI Issue
The grounds crew at Super Bowl-hosting Levi’s Stadium initially painted the Broncos’ name and logo in both end zones.
February 15-22, 2016 SI Double Issue
D-III Keuka College is changing its name to Wolves from Wolfpack after N.C. State threatened legal action.
February 29, 2016 SI Issue
Australian cricket star Shane Warne, appearing on I’m a Celebrity Get Me Out of Here, put his head in a box of snakes and was immediately bitten in the face by a non-poisonous anaconda.
March 7, 2016 SI Issue
Former attorney general Eric Holder used the name Lew Alcindor for his official email address.
March 14, 2016 SI Issue
On Feb. 28 the Bruins waived Zac Rinaldo after he received his third career suspension for an illegal hit. The winger reported to the AHL, and in his first game he delivered another head shot. He was suspended indefinitely.
March 21, 2016 SI Issue
The Vikings have officially requested that a road near their new stadium be changed from Chicago Avenue to Vikings Way.
March 28, 2016 SI Issue
If you’re in Cleveland and ask your iPhone “Where is sadness?” Siri responds with directions to FirstEnergy Stadium, home of the Browns.
April 4, 2016 SI Issue
Brewers reliever Will Smith tore the LCL in his right knee while taking off his shoe.
April 11, 2016 SI Issue
After three years without a fullback, the Eagles decided to add one—so they signed Ryan Mueller, a former defensive end at Kansas State who spent last season on the Chargers’ practice squad as a linebacker. (He was released a month later.)
April 18-25, 2016 SI Double Issue
Sam Hinkie’s bizarre 13-page resignation letter as 76ers GM included an Abe Lincoln quote that Lincoln never said.
May 2, 2016 SI Issue
A Nigerian soccer official assigned referee Wale Akinsanya to a match last week. He died in January.
May 9, 2016 SI Issue
A die-hard Green Bay fan is marrying a woman named Packer and taking her last name.
May 16, 2016 SI Issue
Hawks guard Kent Bazemore fell asleep on the bench during his team’s 123-98 loss to the Cavs on May 4.
May 23, 2016 SI Issue
CD Palencia, a lower-level Spanish soccer team, introduced uniforms that make the players appear skinless.
May 30, 2016 SI Issue
According to TMZ Sports, Floyd Mayweather Jr., who shaves his head, sees a hair stylist two or three times a week and pays $1,000 a pop.
June 6, 2016 SI Issue
Cleveland fans built a pyramid of 112 beer cans during last Friday’s Indians-Orioles game.
June 13, 2016 SI Issue
Peak, a Chinese sneaker company, is giving Cavaliers point guard Matthew Dellavedova a signature shoe, the Delly 1.
June 20, 2016 SI Issue
A professional soccer player in Iran, Sosha Makani, was suspended for six months for wearing bright-yellow trousers adorned with images of SpongeBob SquarePants.
June 27, 2016 SI Issue
Broncos defensive coordinator Wade Phillips’s original Super Bowl ring had the wrong name (Peters) on it.
July 4-11, 2016 SI Double Issue
Shaquille O’Neal, who fell one vote short of being the NBA’s first unanimous MVP in 2000, attempted to troll Steph Curry.
July 18, 2016 SI Issue
A Georgia Southern athletic department staffer did 10 extra-credit assignments for two football players—who still didn’t pass the class.
July 25-August 1, 2016 SI Double Issue
Phil Mickelson, who has earned $81 million on Tour, used a binder clip to keep his hat on.
August 8, 2016 SI Issue
When he found out receiver Josh Doctson was injured, Washington GM Scot McCloughan punched a wall and injured himself.
August 15, 2016 SI Issue
Florida Gulf Coast beat the Providence Storm 92-89 in an exhibition despite playing the last 40 seconds with only three players.
August 22, 2016 SI Issue
Aug. 10 was Umbrella Night at Target Field, when the Twins hosted the Astros. The game got rained out.
August 1-September 5, 2016 SI Double Issue
Brandon Thomas, an outfielder for the independent Gateway Grizzlies, hit a grand slam during a 17-6 win over the Joliet Slammers on Aug. 21, only to discover that the ball broke the windshield of his truck.
September 12, 2016 SI Issue
A couple from India was banned from climbing in Nepal for 10 years after they were caught using altered photos to fake a successful ascent of Mount Everest.
September 26, 2016 SI Issue
English soccer club Mansfield Town canceled a promotion with a clairvoyant, citing “unforeseen circumstances.”
October 3, 2016 SI Issue
One of the new oak trees at Toomer’s Corner was set on fire after Auburn beat LSU 18-13 at home on Saturday.
October 10, 2016 SI Issue
ESPN analyst Mack Brown walked out of the booth with about 10 minutes left while calling the BYU-Toledo game so he could catch a flight.
October 17, 2016 SI Issue
Ecuador striker Enner Valencia allegedly faked an injury during a World Cup qualifier so he could use an ambulance to escape police waiting to arrest him for unpaid child support.
October 25-31, 2016 SI Double Issue
When asked if he’d attended the Paul McCartney concert at the Golden 1 Center, Kings center DeMarcus Cousins admitted he doesn’t know who McCartney is.
November 7, 2016 SI Issue
Gary Player and Yao Ming
November 14, 2016 SI Issue
November 21-28, 2016 SI Double Issue
During a World Cup qualifier, Bosnia forward Edin Dzeko pantsed Greek defender Sokratis Papastathopoulos.
December 5, 2016 SI Issue
Two Hollywood producers are developing a film about the NBA star who ended Cleveland’s title drought: Matthew Dellavedova.
December 12, 2016 SI Double Issue
The football team at Del Oro High in Loomis, Calif., did the mannequin challenge—during the first quarter of a 50-10 win over Antelope High on Nov. 25.
December 19, 2016 SI Issue
A home video of a boy dropping a pass after running into his dog went viral, and the NFL issued a ruling that it was a catch and fumble.
December 26, 2016 SI Issue
North Carolina Central lost the Celebration Bowl 10-9 because of a blocked extra-point attempt that was pushed back by an excessive celebration penalty.