Extra Mustard’s Thursday Night Football drinking game for Week 14
Welcome to the latest installment of Extra Mustard’s Thursday Night Football drinking game. Week 14 features the yeah-but-are-we-sure-they’re-good Arizona Cardinals and the briefly relevant Minnesota Vikings. The Cardinals could win the Super Bowl and still be considered the second-best team in their division. The Vikings were almost going to overtake the Packers for good then remembered they were the Vikings.
This game will probably not be good. You won’t take Carson Palmer seriously because he is so old. You won’t take Teddy Bridgewater seriously because he wears gloves. Fortunately, our drinking game always means business.
Responsibly sip your drink when
You say the words “Matt Asiata” or “Captain Munnerlyn” out loud
You google the University of Phoenix
You confuse Cardinals receivers John and Jaron Brown
You hear the word “rejuvenated” in the same sentence as Carson Palmer
The announcers talk about the removable field
The announcers discuss how much Bruce Arians loves throwing deep
Adrian Peterson runs over a defender
Mike Zimmer looks angry
Responsibly sip your drink twice when
A glimpse of the division standings makes you question how closely you follow the NFL
Call your parents and tell them you love them when
You wonder if Hans and Mike Zimmer are related
You wonder if Carson and Jesse Palmer are related
You wonder if David and Chris Johnson are related
You wonder if John and Jaron Brown are related
Finish your drink if
You wonder if real Vikings ever played football
You flip over to Michael Bublé’s Christmas special