A Utah high school basketball player is named Stockton Malone Shorts

It doesn't get much better than this.

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In a sign that parental humor is alive and well, a Utah high school basketball star is named...wait for it...

Stockton. Malone. Shorts. 

This is Stockton Malone Shorts. He's the best player in the highest level of Utah high school ball this year. Yes, that's really his name. pic.twitter.com/RXRqcKGchO

— Andy Larsen (@andyblarsen) February 28, 2017

Stockton Malone Shorts is more than just an absolutely perfect name for a Utahn. He's averaging 24.2 points per game, and he scored 17 and posted 7 rebounds on Monday to lead Copper Hills to Utah's 5A boys basketball quarterfinals.

This is all the inspiration I need to name my first-born Shaq Kobe Rapaport.