Tuesday November 24th, 2015

You think because it’s Thanksgiving the Thursday games are going to be any good?

Okay, fine, the NFL’s Thanksgiving slate this year is actually not completely terrible. The Eagles and Lions game could be filled with defensive touchdowns. The Packers always find new ways to torment the Bears. And the Panthers have one of the most exciting players in football.

Of course, any positive football happenings will be canceled out by slow-eating family members and a startling lack of gravy for how much you plan to use. Fortunately, our Thanksgiving drinking game extravaganza is here to make sure nothing can bother you on this special day.

Responsibly sip your drink when

Mark Sanchez throws an interception 

Matthew Stafford throws the ball from a weird arm angle

An offensive lineman takes a bite out of a turkey leg on camera

Jay Cutler is seen scowling

You take your first bite of stuffing

Someone takes way too long with the gravy

Aaron Rodgers makes a perfect back shoulder throw

Brett Favre is described as a gunslinger

Cam Newton dances or smiles

Any player says they are thankful for something

You’re shown B-roll of thanksgiving food

The Cowboys are referred to as “America’s Team”

You think about the leftovers sandwich you’re going to make tomorrow

Take two drinks when

Someone wants to turn the TV to a college game

A family member blocks the TV during a crucial play

A family member says “football is too violent”

Refill your drink if

Brett Favre cries while his number is being retired

Johnny Manziel is mentioned at any point

Someone does a Lambeau Leap

Finish your drink if

An inadvertent whistle is blown

Tony Romo throws a game-sealing interception

Jay Cutler throws a game-sealing interception

Mark Sanchez throws a game-sealing interception

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